I totally nerd out for musicals. I would stare in awe and stammer if I met Lin-Manuel Miranda more than I would George Clooney. Musicals have always made me happy, since I first fell in love with “Phantom of the Opera” when I was in seventh grade. While I’ve found all types of music resonates with me, I’ve always felt the closest connections to my own life and feelings through musical theatre.
When I saw “Next to Normal” last year it changed my life. The story follows a family coping with the mother’s bipolar diagnosis, through the highs of mania and the lows of depression. The music is so striking and so powerful. It hit me in the gut while reminding me that we’re not alone.
As the countdown is on to starting IVF (T minus four days), I’ve drawn strength from a few key lyrics in the show’s finale, “Light.” I’ve listened to the cast recording of this show ad nauseum, but have only listened to this song a handful of times because it makes me cry (this is not an unusual pattern for me — I regularly skip the last songs of “Rent,” “Hamilton” and “Les Miserables,” too, because the waterworks start). It feels applicable now, as I take this next step in trying to have a baby.
We need some light.
First of all, we need some light.
You can’t sit here in the dark.
And all alone, it’s a sorry sight.
It’s just you and me.
We’ll live, you’ll see.